Strength of the Umbilical Cord

Read an article where Salim Khan said that Salman Khan is not married because he looks for his mother's qualities in his would be life partner. This left me thinking and I realised that it is not only true for Salman but probably for all men. Then I wondered if my husband is also like that....and to my utter surprise I realised that yes he is!!! 10 years of marriage and I never realised it earlier! Now I know why he did not appreciate the moong dal that I made last Sunday, definitely he was comparing it with his Mom's dal. Now I can see that every instance where he did not appreciate my efforts, are because he found it lacking compared to his Mom's. God I was blind all these years.

A feminist was born that day!! All thanks to Salim Khan.

I started hating all men who think Mom is the best and wife has a long way to go. I became a staunch supporter of the Wife Club (if any). We wives, have to suffer so much because of this Umbilical Cord attachment. That was the time when the newspapers also started featuring reports about 'How Men Can Never Break the Umbilical Cord' or similar reports. Were such reports always there in the newspapers and I ignored? Or is it that the world has awakened along with me to this bitter truth?

Anyways, I the poor soul, continued with my life with a resolution, that the day he utters one word of comparison, he will know why people say "Ghayal Sherni bahut khatarnaak hoti hai".

My son, my love was playing one day with his word making game. And he made the word MARRIAGE on the board, turned towards me and said - "Mamma I will marry Aryan!" I was numb with shock for a few moments (which did not look like moments at all). Then slowly I came back to my senses and tried to reason out things with him. "Lovu you cannot marry a boy, because you are a boy. Look at mamma, she is a girl and so she married a  boy. That's how it has to be." He looked at me scornfully and said - "Arya is a girl mamma." What a relief!! I did not know why I added the alphabet 'N' and panicked. Then trying to be normal and with a forced smile I asked- "how does she look?" "She looks alright mamma". "If she looks just alright then we will find someone who looks very very pretty because you are my prince Lovu". "No mamma, Arya is the one. She does not cry and does not take nonsense. You push her once she will push you twice. You say something bad to her and she will teach you a lesson. She is very strong. She is good at studies too and is very intelligent."

Till now I never knew that a 7 year old can think so much.... I was dumb when I was that young. So, softly I asked - "that's why you want to marry her?" He left his board game, turned towards me and said - "I want to marry her because she is like you ......  totally like you ...strong and all other qualities. So I will marry her!" He turned towards his board game again.

That was the best day of my life. I was happy and ready to jump with joy, when it flashed through my mind  - isn't this a symptom of Umbilical Cord attachment?

Realisation dawned on me  - I AM NO FEMINIST, JUST AN OPPORTUNIST!!

P.S. I truly hope he never gets to know my grades.

When you think past is behind you!!

After 10 years of marriage and mothering a 7 year old son, the only thing that is in my mind nowadays is to be back in shape! No, it does not mean that I have no shape now. I have one... a very much loved one by my son. He finds immense pleasure in jumping into my lap, which acts as a cushion for him. He loves to pinch (not hard) my oversized arms saying 'Mamma, so soft'. I, the always wanting to go back to shape I, find solace in his words.

So what went wrong, when did this craving for going slim creep into my mind? Well, after being super thin all my life, my world changed when Ishan came to my life. No it is not baby weight, I shed that immediately after his birth. This is weight which I gained because I could not stop eating for two people, way after he was born!!  Yes, you heard it right. The pregnancy hunger pangs never left me. Now I am consciously trying to put an end to that craving, sending a strong message to my body - "enough, there is no kid inside and you don't need that much food!"

People who kept on saying "don't you get food" all my growing up years, changed their dialogue - 'you gained so much weight'. I don't know if the problem is with them or me. I mean these are the same people who had issues with my 'NO Weight' state....and now when I have gained some instead of appreciating they are complaining again!!  Yeah I know, I did not gain weight to make them happy, but when they have a chance to be happy why they are not??

I have no major concern about my weight gain, more so when I am not having any problem in my day to day life. But then people.....these people......why don't they let my past be past and accept me as I am.

Well guys, I am the same person you knew always......  yes with extra weight but still the same. Please let my past rest in peace!!