Growing Up!!

I always worry how Ishan is growing up without a proper Bengali upbringing. I know it sounds foolish, but I truly want him to know how my baba and mum grew up, how me and my siblings grew up…. those small happiness, small moments. In a big city like Mumbai, all that he gets to do never look sufficient to me. One has far more independence in a smaller town. Big fields, big parks, mango orchards to go and steal, neighbours who are more like family. I try to inculcate in him the habits that we all had….. I force him to read books, I force him to play board games. The list is long…..

But day before yesterday I witnessed something and it made me think for long. In the evening, Ishan wanted to go out and play with his friends and I obliged. There I saw him doing something unusual. He and his friends wrote a big OM (in hindi, of course) in a card board, they stole some Diwali diyas and lit them….one of the kids got a mat and all of them sat down….. someone managed to get kumkum powder and all of them made tilaks….. then Ishan became the purohit and recited all the mantras that I taught him…..starting from Saraswati mantra, Durga, Shiva, Manasha. One of the kids asked him to recite Hanuman Chalisa. So he started…Jai Hanuman Gyaan Gun Sagar……. and after that what he said I did not understand because he does not know the chalisa….. but all the other kids thought he knew and they were all listening with rapt attention. The way he played the part of a purohit was commendable, he was very confident. Then he remembered the naam kirtan that my mother does at home and he started - Jay Jay Dayananda…….. all the kids also chanted with him…….

I was amazed to see that he remembers the mantras which he repeats before going to sleep. That he took the role of purohit and did the puja….. that he knew when to offer flowers and when to chant the mantras..... that they chose to do a puja instead of playing and fighting and getting hurt…..

Suddenly I was a proud mother. Not everything is so bad to worry about……….. but I am a mother….a selfish one who wants her kid to get the best of everything……. So…….. bye bye till I worry again!!

I insist on saying Happy Kali Pujo!!

When I was young, I did not know what Diwali was...... it was Kali Pujo for us. Yes, after Durga Pujo we used to wait for Kali Pujo and we knew that on the next day of Kali Pujo we will burst crackers..... 'baji porano'. Don't know if the term 'Diwali' had so much importance then. 'Dhanteras' was a totally alien word to us.

So it was Kali Pujo that we used to be geared up for. Washing the diyas, keeping them in water so that it does not get super dry, then drying them little, pouring oil, thread (solte) and keeping the diyas ready was the best thing that I remember. I used to be super happy doing all these. Then in the evening after lighting them I used to run to the road to see how my house is looking from there..... used to go and watch it from every possible angle and come home satisfied. Then running around with candle in hand so that the diyas keep burning till night. Aaah what fun!!...... The pujo always used to start at night...so after bursting some crackers we used to go to the nearest pujo pandal and sit there for a while. Next day morning we used to go to Samshan Kali Bari to have a darshan and prasad and then we used to wait for evening to burst more crackers. This is what my Kali Pujo used to be.

Kali pujo used to be followed by Bhai fota and I always waited for that. The wait was more for the gift than the urge to give fota. Although I knew the gifts that I was going to get, still the wait was great. The gifts had a set pattern - pen set, slam book, comics, hair band, hair clips. However repetitive it was, I was never tired of them and used to love the fact that Dada was giving something.

Till date, I go to Silchar during Kali Pujo and give bhai fota to dada and still love getting gifts.... yes the gifts have become more matured gifts now. :)

But the essence of Kali Pujo has changed now. Even in Silchar I hear people waiting for Diwali and not Kali Pujo. I know the name does not change anything but it kills the emotion that I have kept alive within me all these years. We are Bengalis and it is Kali Pujo for us. Yes, I am sounding odd I know, but that is what I love to call it. So, I do not know how to react when a Bengali wishes me 'Happy Dhanteras'.....well I definitely respond back politely but then why? Someone who celebrates Dhanteras should be wished the same, we celebrate Kali Pujo so we should be wished that way.

So today on Dhanteras day....I wish Dhanteras to all who celebrate Dhanteras, Diwali to all who celebrate Diwali and Kali Pujo to all my Bengali friends!!

Have a great Kali Pujo!!